well, i haven't talked about being off the meds for a while now... and i suppose it is way past time for an update.

looking back, i've been off of them for about four months, which seems to me to be a very long time!  longer than i thought anyway.  the first two weeks or so were really rough.  i didn't think i was going to be able to do it.  but, i persevered and by the Grace of God, i have made it to the point that i am at now.

so, what is that point that i am at right now?  i have good days and bad days...  just like anyone else who suffers from depression or anyone else who suffers from life.  i do find that i have a bit of a hard time discerning for myself whether i am over-reacting to a situation or not.

in the post-partum support group that i was a part of, one of the leaders said something that really stuck with me.  she told me that feelings aren't right or wrong, feelings just are.  and, it's how you deal with them that is important.  and while i still have to remind myself of that, it certainly helps.

i do think that i'm still a little more sensitive than before.  it's hard for me not to take things personally.

however, in hindsight, i would not give up that bump in my road.  it has made me a stronger person.  it has made jason and i a stronger couple.  his unending support and his ability to gauge what i need to make me stronger has been a life saver.  we are much more appreciative of each other and of the role that we each play in our family.  and we try to tell each other that as well.  i don't know what i would do without him to send me off to ballet, kick me out to walmart when i've had a rough day, and just to listen when i ramble on about things.  he is a wonderful man.

so, i'm getting better.  i'm stronger.  and this dark time has been made into a blessing.